Here are some of the contenders for today's biggest...news...of...the...day...

• Downbeat comments from Wal-Mart Stores Inc (WMT)...
• The acquisition of Thinkorswim Group Inc (SWIM) by TD Ameritrade Holding Corp (AMTD)...
• Job cuts at EMC Corp (EMC)...
• A warning from President-elect Barack Obama that the government needs to take immediate steps to revive the economy...
• A downgrade for IntercontinentalExchange (ICE)...
• A drop in same-store sales from Sears Holdings Corp (SHLD)...
• A rate cut from the Bank of England...
• Expectations that tomorrow's jobs report will bring "a massive nonfarm payrolls decline of 533,000...the worst monthly job loss since December 1974..."
• A look into why banks aren't lending money...
• A report that says U.S. companies could face a "$409 billion deficit on pension plans..."
• Comments from the CEO of Sony Ericsson...
• Store closures by Macy's Inc (M)...
• An unexpected drop in weekly jobless claims...
• A move by USG Corp. (USG) to amend its credit line...
• An interesting study that shows "the more we feel out of control, the more our brains imagine patterns that don't really exist..."
• Word that Verizon picked Microsoft Corp (MSFT), instead of Google Inc (GOOG), to be the default wireless search provider...
• Charges related to Clearwire Corp (CLWR) for firms such as Time Warner Inc (TWX) and Intel Corp (INTC)...Google Inc (GOOG) is also mentioned...

While those are all stories worth watching, I think it is obviously clear that the biggest news is this set of stories -

• Mail carrier to thief:: Take that, you dog - "An on-duty mail carrier who was robbed of her cell phone...chased down the thief, spraying him with a chemical meant to ward off dogs...it was Moe's second theft this week..."
• Police: Woman tries to firebomb neighbor's house - "...woman lobbed flaming bottles of gasoline onto a neighbor's house..."
• Angry smoker accused of burning 'no smoking' sign - "...a man set a 'No Smoking' sign on fire after being told he could not light up inside a nightclub..."
• Hot-headed Beijing Zoo panda attacks again: state media - "A Beijing Zoo panda known for his bad temper has tasted human blood for the third time, attacking a man who jumped into the animal's enclosure..."

So...another day, another set of stories about people doing dumb things. Regular readers might assume that I am going to lump the last story in with the animal uprising, but that isn't the case. While there is a disturbing amount of evidence that suggests animals are conspiring, I can't blame one for defending its home. As I said last month -

"...let's talk about people mixing with wild animals. At what point will people realize that Pandas are not giant stuffed animals. Last month we saw a college student bit after he invaded the bear's enclosure and tried to hug it. Today we see someone else bit while in an enclosure. I think that even I can offer a solution to this oh so vexing problem. Stay out of the enclosures while the bears are there!"