Here are some of the contenders for today's biggest...news...of...the...day...

• A management shakeup at Lehman Bros. Holding (LEH)...
• Earnings from Thornburg Mortgage Inc (TMA)...
• A buyout bid for Anheuser-Busch (BUD) by InBev...
• A licensing agreement for Starbucks Corp (SBUX)...
• The purchase of Applied Biosystems Group (ABI) by Invitrogen Corp. (IVGN)...
• Earnings from China Medical Technologies, Inc. (CMED)...
• The Fed's new war of words...
• A look into the belief by Monsanto (MON) that "the food crisis will create new markets for genetically modified products..."
• A move by the FBI to focus on subprime...

While those are all stories worth watching, I think it is obviously clear that the biggest story is this - Man Who Fell Off Couch Laughing at TV Show Ends Up Pepper Sprayed, Arrested, courtesy of my colleague Andrea Kramer. According to the article, a British man "...was so amused with BBC1's 'Have I Got News for You' that he fell off his couch in a fit of laughter..." The resulting "thud" spurred concern from a neighbor who called the police. At some point the 'laugher' thought it would be a 'good idea' to try "to shut his door on the officers"...

And for those looking for a reason to take a vacation check this out - 'Come to Ocean City' before the ocean disappears, says ad. Yep, that right - the mayor of Ocean City is "calling on vacationers to book 'before our planet spirals to a vaporous death...'"

Nothing says let's relax like talk of "a vaporous death..."