Here are some of the contenders for today's biggest...news...of...the...day...
- Store closures at Circuit City Stores Inc (CC)...
- Word that Kohlberg Kravis Roberts has delayed its IPO plans...
- Word that Morgan Stanley (MS) has "canceled all plans for Christmas celebrations this year..."
- Earnings from DryShips Inc (DRYS)...
- Earnings from Nicor Inc (GAS)...
- A collaboration deal between Microsoft Corp (MSFT) and LG Electronics Inc...
- Woes at VeraSun Energy Corp (VSE) and other ethanol producers...
- Concerns that the "record plunge in commodities may signal the U.S. is headed for the longest recession since 1981..."
- A new focus for Salesforce.com Inc (CRM)...
- Upbeat comments on General Electric (GE)...
- Upbeat comments from Lowe's Cos (LOW)...
- An upgrade for Wal-Mart Stores (WMT) as J.P. Morgan upped the stock to overweight...
- A repurchase plan from Baidu.com Inc (BIDU)...
- Upbeat comments from Hartford Financial Services (HIG)...
- An argument that it is "time to buy stocks..."
While those are all stories worth watching, I think it is obviously clear that the biggest news is this set of stories -
- Naked pumpkin runners ticketed in Colorado - "...police have ticketed about a dozen people running naked on the street while sporting freshly gutted pumpkins on their heads..."
- Brazil sets rules for its official cocktail - "...government has published legal guidelines insisting that a caipirinha must be made just so..."
- Twinkies get slimmed down - "...remade and repackaged into 100-calorie snack packs...the original Twinkie come in at 150 calories...people enjoy having multiple bites rather than just the one product..."
- Wallaby goes walkabout in Canada - "An intrepid wallaby has escaped from its pen at an exotic zoo and gone on an 80-kilometer (50-mile) walkabout across eastern Canada where he remained on the lam..."
So...naked pumpkin runners, legal guidelines for a drink, "slimmed down"
Twinkies, and escaped animals. Yup, it is going to be one of those weeks...
While the first story isn't exactly another arrested while naked situation I think it is close enough to be lumped into that category. What caught my eye in the Twinkies article is the comment about how people seem to perceive a difference between one larger product and a number of small ones. Seriously, are people really that easily fooled? Instead of going through all this work of creating a new product, they should have just included a plastic knife with each Twinkie and told people to cut it into fourths before eating.
The last story, of course, is just another example of a wayward wallaby. The best part of this story is the advice given at the end -
"...Saunders urged anyone who spots Wendell to grab him by the tail and stuff him in a pillow case..."
Yeah, this is going to end badly. As this post highlights pretty much each and every day, there are a lot of people out there doing really dumb things. It is hard to predict what exactly happens here but I am going to be on the lookout for a story along the lines of -
"...injured while trying to stuff a badger into a pillow case after believing it was a lost wallaby..."
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