Here are some of the contenders for today's biggest...news...of...the...day...

• Earnings from Dell Inc (DELL)...
• Earnings from Gap Inc (GPS)...
• Earnings from H.J. Heinz Co (HNZ)...
• Earnings from AnnTaylor Stores Corp (ANN)...
• Earnings from Canadian Solar Inc (CSIQ)...
• Reports that say Citigroup Inc (C) is "preliminary stages of discussing a possible sale..."
• Optimism on oil stocks...National-Oilwell Varco Inc (NOV) is singled out...[note for contrarians - according to Zacks, 12 of 13 analysts already rank the stock with a "buy" rating...]
• A new CEO for Wal-Mart Stores Inc (WMT)...
• The announcement by Visa Inc (V) that "it might incur 'significant' charges in fiscal 2009..."
• An oil find for Petroleo Brasileiro SA (PBR)...
• Delisting concerns for Freddie Mac (FRE)...
• A dividend cut at KeyCorp (KEY)...
• Upbeat comments on the economy from Jeffrey Lacker...
• The push by LinkedIn to expand as other companies cut back...
• Concerns about deflation...

While those are all stories worth watching, I think it is obviously clear that the biggest news is this set of stories -

• Dog hits controls, drives van into coffee house - "...His dog, Bentley, somehow knocked the controls..."
• Obese have right to two airline seats - "Obese people have the right to two seats for the price of one on flights within Canada, the Supreme Court of Canada ruled..."
• Japanese bathe in Beaujolais - "...braved the cold temperature to dip in a wine bath for the midnight uncorking of this season's Beaujolais..."
• Government warns of "catastrophic" U.S. quake - "People in a vast seismic zone in the southern and midwestern United States would face catastrophic damage if a major earthquake struck there and should ensure that builders keep that risk in mind..."

So...we find another thinly veiled example of the animal uprising as the media spins a dog's van attack as an accident...I'll let you draw your own opinion about the other articles, I am too busy being freaked out about the prospects of a catastrophic earthquake...